Joy, Breakdown, Relief

Well... my first full day in town was wonderful and interesting.... It went a little something like this.

After catching up with emails, blog and Facebook at Stimulus, I decided to walk home along the beach instead of the road. It was so amazing and soothing. Empty beach, except for a few couples and some folks walking their dogs. It was easy to spot the dune that leads right to my home and I had time to unpack my boxes before heading out to wander.

My interview was at 10:30, so I walked through town to check out the market and other shops and businesses first. Everyone I have met is simply lovely. Friendly and kind and each one welcomed me to town with a smile and handshake.

The interview went well and I was hired before I left the office. I start today and absolutely adore the people I will be working for. He is very Gruff Old Englishman and she is ... well, she is me in about 15 years. As I was leaving, she mentioned that there would be live music that evening in the bar and I agreed to stop back for it.

I spent the rest of the day exploring the beach and the marketplace around this end of town (where the coffee shop is). I couldn't believe how the beach exploded with people! Totally bananas!

There was an hour or so in the evening when I had a complete meltdown. Just sat on the floor in my room and cried. It was a mixture of sadness, awe, joy, loneliness, and a little anxiety about where I would live after November 1st. I knew I could stay where I am, but don't really want to. However, apartments are hard to come by in Pacific City (or so I was told). There was even a smidgen of "what have I done? was this a mistake?"

Someone once said that being brave doesn't mean you aren't scared. It means you are scared but do it anyway. That would make me one very brave girl. But even in the middle of sitting on the floor, sobbing, I knew that this whole trip was about listening to my heart and following my dream. The rest is just faith that The Universe will put me where I need to be.

Finally, I picked myself up and went out to listen to music at my new place of business. My boss sat with me and she and I fell into easy and comfortable conversation. As if we'd been friends for years. I told her about my concerns regarding a place to live and whether or not I should grab one apartment that is available on October 1st, even though I've already paid rent where I am till the end of October. I said, "I would hate to give notice where I am, lose that one and find that there isn't anywhere to go on November 1st". She told me to just relax and stay where I am for the time that I've already paid. Then she added, "we've got an Inn. You will never be homeless. In fact, we may be able to work something out for you."

So, once again, I felt that invisible hand on my shoulder, letting me know that I was going to be OK. More than OK, even. I am going to be great. I'll still have my moments of freaking out and tiny anxieties, but as long as I listen to my heart, use my head, and do the work, I'll be where I'm supposed to be.